September 2024 Story Sparks


Calm Amidst Exhaustion

Draw alongside the silence of stone
Until its calmness can claim you.
Be excessively gentle with yourself.
Stay clear of those vexed in spirit.
Learn to linger around someone of ease
Who feels they have all the time in the world.

From “For One Who is Exhausted”
by John O’Donohue in Bless the Space Between Us

One of my favorite books is Bless the Space Between Us mentioned above. In tender, singular words, this Irish Priest (now deceased) penned dozens of beautiful blessings. The poetry speaks into so many spaces. Today, it is a blessing for the exhausted which I happen to be. There may be a few of you out there experiencing that too. Looking after grandkids. Working two jobs. Healing. The poet’s gentle advice to “draw alongside the silence of stones” makes me think of my poet/writer friend Susan Tweit’s newsletter featuring stone birdbaths that nourish more than birds. I like his encouragement to be gentle with oneself and to stay clear “of those vexed in spirit.” I often refer to such people as “energy vampires” whom you can recognize by the clench in your stomach at the exact same time as their name appears on caller ID. To have exhaustion acknowledged and with guidance for moving through it feels calm and gives me a way to be gentle with myself.

My exhaustion comes from caregiving, over commitments, the refrigerator dying on the same day that I fell, chipped a bone and tore all of the ligaments in what I fondly refer to as “the airplane ankle” that shattered years ago. And I hit my head. At least this time, the foot isn’t shattered, just chipped – no surgery needed – just the boot and six weeks without driving.

Jerry and I had chatted a couple of weeks before I stood up only to fall down, that we’d be toast if something happened to me. Well, we might be a bit scorched but we aren’t yet toast. My cousin was visiting when it happened and she took me to the ER (the CT scan says I’m normal though friends might question this). Then she extended her stay for four more days to help us get settled into our new world. A home health nurse tended to Jerry struggling with an antibiotic-resistant infection. Oh, yes, and Rupert was neutered the same day I fell so pills, extra care for him was needed while the refrigerator kept dying. Friends from our church picked up a knee scooter from the equipment donation room and brought it out. The fridge repairman came and ordered the part. Other friends brought us a meal, another loaned us a cooler for the food now not refrigerating and we’d ramped up the empty freezer just the month before for blueberries and cherries friends brought us (thank you Mike and Marea Stone) so when the next friend came for four days, she had a freezer to put food into. My neighbor takes the garbage out. Another one picks up milk. A third is walking Rupert. Blessings have filled so many spaces.

And still, I am exhausted. The smallest of chores – challenge. Load the dishwasher – remember to lock the brakes on the scooter before bending to the appliance. Get Jerry his lunch – think ahead about how to transfer the soup to the table. And going to the bathroom…It has made me more sympathetic to dear Jerry for how much pain drains. And I do think about those who don’t have a future of “six weeks and it’ll be better.” It’s made me vow that when I’m more able-bodied, I’m going to find a way to relieve the exhaustion of others. Maybe be that person whom someone exhausted can ease up next to, who feels “they have all the time in the world.” Just to be with you. May your exhaustion be short-lived and may you too find the blessings of the spaces between us.

Meditation

I’m old enough to remember when the word meditation got a bad rap, as though it was a challenger to prayer. But centering prayer groups abound now and some of thea same learning curves look very much like those meditating to clear one’s mind of clutter so that as poet Mary Oliver says in her poem Praying, “another voice may speak.” In my own efforts at centering prayer, my mind jumps around like a Mexican jumping bean (I’m old enough to remember those too.) So here’s a Pearls Before Swine Cartoon by Stephen Pastis featuring a meditation effort.

And to add to your draw “alongside the silence of stone” I’ve included a short video. I could watch it over and over. It’s a way I’m being gentle with myself. You may have other ways. I’d love to hear about them. But this one may give you respite. There is music so turn it on or not.

The Writing Life

In July, I turned in book one called Across the Crying Sands. Then I took an on-line writing class with Shirley Jump shirleyjump.com about writing with emotion. Many of her classes are free and include lively Youtube videos. I took this class through Women Writing the West where she provided feedback, partly because I’d been feeling exhausted even before my fall and I worried that I’d carried that pall into my story. I feared my readers wouldn’t be as engaged as much as I wanted them to be. Eleven days later, class finished, I asked for the manuscript back! And in doing so, I could see places where I’d spent a lot of time “telling” rather than “showing” which is of course what we writers don’t want to do. Fortunately my publisher (Revell) allowed me to take it back. A member of my prayer team sent me a fitting image of a weary writer saying “If you’re happy and you know it, overthink” which is of course what I’m doing but it is also part of my desire to give my best. The editor sent me the designed copy that shows all the blocks of texts that for me is a clue to perhaps more telling than needed. So I challenged myself to write one sentence that just might cover what’s in that seven-sentence paragraph. I’ve sent it back and hope I’ve made the manuscript tighter hoping too, that next May when you see it at your favorite bookstore, you’ll be happy I’ve given you a fascinating read into the life of the woman I’ve chosen to highlight.

Events

September 13 – 15 : Sister’s Festival of Books.  September 15 – 11:00am-3:00pm – Sisters, OR at the Sisters movie house, 720 Desperado Ct, Sister’s OR. (Jane loves that address!) Stop by, buy books the proceeds of which help scholarships and non-profits. Tons of great programming. Tickets and schedule available here. Sistersfob.org. If you haven’t picked up copies of Beneath the Bending Skies or The Healing of Natalie Curtis, this will be a great day to do so. Jane’ll be with best-selling author Melody Carlson. Come visit them both!

Will Rodgers Lifetime Achievement Award Ceremony
October 19th, 2024 – Ft. Worth, Texas. Recipient of the Will Rogers Lifetime Achievement Award, Details on their website for tickets and hotel information.

Book Release
May 20 – 2025 – Release date for Across the Crying Sands. Details forthcoming.

Cannon Beach Historical Museum
June 7, 2025 – 2:00pm – Presentation at Cannon Beach Historical Museum, Cannon Beach, Oregon. Stay tuned for more details

Tillamook Library
June 13, 2025 – Tillamook Library presentation, Tillamook, Oregon. Stay tuned for details.

Word Whisperings

Lady Tan’s Circle of Women
by Lisa See, Scribner – 2023

The NY Times book review describes author Lisa See as one of those “special writers capable of both poetry and plot.” This is such an incisive sentence! I’ve read other books by this fine writer but this one spoke in new tones. It takes place in 1400s China when Confucius wrote “An educated woman is a useless woman.” Yet Tan Xunxian is educated by her grandmother to be a useful woman, one who understands the healing needs of women. Using the Four Examinations – looking, listening, touching and asking – young Xunxian moves through the death of her mother, her arranged marriage, the anxiety of delivering only female children and the lifelong friendship with a midwife who has “big feet” that are not broken and bound and that mark her as belonging to a lower status. The constraints on women, especially wealthy women confined to a single dwelling until marriage then confined to her mother-in-law’s house was a fascinating look at personal freedoms within an ancient world of women. While reading this expansive saga well into the night, I thought often of the women in my book All Together in One Place who moved through wilderness places too with family, friends and faith. Those pioneer women had more in common with those ancients than I would have thought possible. Highly recommend this read!

Finding Resilience: Stories that Reflect Us

I’m gradually putting weight on my foot, using a cane. Next week I’ll attempt having a friend walk with me while I try to manage Rupert, maybe walking as far as to the mailbox. Jerry’s infection is much improved. But there are other next steps ahead too. The catalog copy for the May release has been written and approved. I can hardly wait to see the cover! You’ll see it shortly after its approved. The second book in the series is due in January and lots of steps are needed before I can turn it in. My film collaborator and agent stopped by with her family on their Northwest vacation and we met face to face for the first time. A great delight. Jerry’s wheelchair has been ordered which we hope will improve his quality of life though until I can drive again, he’s not likely to be going anywhere. Still we’ve had the opportunity to tell each other that we are both each other’s best friend. We are able to “linger with …all the time in the world” in the shelter of each other. Here’s a video that expresses that for me.

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Have a great week and “be excessively gentle with yourself” as you linger around someone of ease. I hope this Story Sparks has been such a place. Until next month,

With gratitude,

P.S. I often get requests from those wishing a book list of my titles. Incidentally, Wikipedia has some errors. Visit my Bibliography webpage for the real scoop.